Lat night, as I was making dinner, it was battle of the bands with me and the next-door neighbour, Melissa, singing as we cooked. I was rocking out to Desmond Dekker's original rude boy version of Israelites while Melissa was goin` all vibrato with the Magnetic Fields version of Papa Was a Rodeo. You'll have to ask an objective third party who won. I have decided to stop worrying about my quality of life and just slow down my brain a bit. This sounds hideously self-absorbed, but I have been in this loop of restlessness cuz I kept just *wanting* stuff. Everything. And then getting all mad at myself for feeling dissatisfied. I can't explain it so well, but let's just say it wasn't so zen. Last night I did all the good shit like taking a bath, cooking, and reading this awesome existential Japanese mystery novel called "The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle." And refused to let that old feeling creep in. Today I feel like all my senses are about 10 times more awake.
