Any rock and roll band worth their salt knows that Little Drummer Boy is the only song they can get away with singing on that Christmas compilation. Everything else has too much icing.
I was doing a little holiday shopping when the song "Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time - Paul McCartney's shockingly unironic attempt at thrusting one of his compositions into the Christmas music pantheon - came over the sound system.
And it occurred to me. This song needs to have a skewering punk rock makeover. In fact, it demands it.
But when you look a little closer, every carol has a snarling, satirical alter-ego. And I can't NOT hear "White Christmas" as something that ought to be sung tongue-and-cheek by someone of colour.
And of course 12-year-old in me takes great mirth in "Santa Claus is Coming" (which gets funnier each time it's repeated) and FORGET ABOUT "Backdoor Santa" - which needs no makeover. Oh, Clarence Carter.
So yeah, I will take Fairytale in New York any Christmas. It's my favourite seasonal song of all time, I tell you. All time.
