subway musical 
steven tyler photo 
jumping into tracks 
you tell him! 
cockroach 
empty car 
 
i'm going to puke 
train rules 
the last month 
stereotypical crazy mumbler 
drunks 
piddle puddle 
 
rock paper scissors 
random attack 
a man's shoes 
2 sentence story 
doors 
i am no help 
 
head 
are you threatening me? 
damn metrocard swipers 
comfortably asleep on my shoulder 
kick her ass 
almost bitten 
 
while i kiss the pole 
you're getting wet 
things not to pick up 
fondled twice 
turnie the turnstile turner 
subway curse 
 
apology to the mta 
subway music 
also good 
absolutely worse day in history 
cat on dog action 
religious icons performing oral sex 
 
mommy, i'm scared 
high alert 
white powder 
school of hard knocks 
maxims 
you don't have to go to university 
 
homework robot 
see you 
sully 
adina 
change 
be careful with the donuts 
 
flava flav 
that little sh*t bit me 
smelly 
i rebuke you demon in the name of jesus 
all day foreplay 
poo story #49202 
 
special dancers 
pee story #1283 
Subway Stories: true stories from new york's transit system 
submit your own 

i am no help
by Senor Manbot
Wow! The Sick Passenger is right there.
After logging thousands and thousands of hours on the MTA, I have finally seen a sick passenger. This year especially, there always seems to be a sick passenger on the train. Usually on mornings where I really need to be somewhere and/or am already running late – and this morning was no exception.
As we pull up to 14th street, something happens.
I am standing against the door reading crap on my palm and have my headphones on when the older gentleman in front of me quickly moves away. I look down and there is this girl laying at my feet staring up at me with her eyes wide open. Lucky for me and my lack of life saving skills, two women nearby jump on the scene to see if the girl’s all right. They help her up and put her in a seat and ask her where she is going.

Now, let me rewind here for a second. Minutes before this happened; the regular ‘mentally challenged battery salesman’ had just got on the car. It’s really hard to describe this guy except to say that he has really thick glasses, sells batteries, and has this almost endearing sales pitch that I wish I could describe better.
Mr. Battery guy realizes that this is his time to shine and steps out onto the platform and begins to loudly announce, “This Manhattan bound F train is being held in the station because of a customer having a seizure”. He announces this loudly into our car (duh!) and then over and over again to the folks on the platform. Even with a sick passenger in the train, this is a pretty funny situation and many riders attempt not to smile.

The girl is sitting in a seat with these two other women fussing over her. She seems fine and appears to know where she is and what is happening. Then she just stands up and walks quickly out of the train and up the stairs.
Everyone just stands there – a bit shocked that she just left.
No one runs after her.
She is gone.

We stand around for a few minutes and battery guy is yelling to the conductor that the passenger just left. The train starts and the two women who were taking care of her start talking about the guy that was standing in front of me and how he got out of the way and let her collapse onto the floor.
Right in front of him.
The guy is probably in his 50’s and is dressed way too nice and doesn’t say anything. He’s comes off as being an ass.








© happyrobot.net 1998-2024
powered by robots :]